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September 12, 2007

SAF Would _ucking Anyone

From 100% Injury Rate:

"It seems that Sir Alex Ferguson (yes, that means he's a knight), who is the manager of Manchester United, was on his way to attend a 9/11 charity event in London on Monday to raise money for families of those killed in the terrorist attacks......when he was attacked by a man at a train station. According to The Mirror, the guy was "yelling football-related abuse." Oh you classy English soccer fans. You couldn't possibly be more subtle.

A British Transport Police spokesman confirmed that the 65-year-old manager suffered leg injuries. Sir Alex, however, still attended the event. Why? Because he's a f*cking soldier, that's why. No, seriously I salute him for attending the event."

How would other EPL managers have handled the situation? My theories:

- Arsene Wenger, being French, would have volunteered all his money, credit cards, and the French mainland immediately, even though the guy seemed to be interested only in assault.

- Jose Mourinho would have called a press conference to complain about how the incident merited a direct red card and that these kinds of things never happen to Man U.

- Rafa Benitez would have tactically outwitted the criminal.

- Roy Keane would have killed the guy with his bare hands, assuming that the attacker was a 15-year old kid.

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