Sports Frog

I laugh only so I don't cry.

I have started to collect Dusty Baker quotes in this spring training thread in the Swamp, but belatedly realize that my pain as a Reds fan might bring amusement to the rest of you. So, here's the highlights of Dusty Baker's first week of spring training quotations:

"Baker said it's possible the Reds could carry three catchers. "It depends on how things go," Baker said. "Late in the game, you'd love to have a guy like Bako behind the plate for a double switch or to pinch-hit. I told [general manager] Wayne [Krivsky] I'm looking for options. The more options I have, the more things you can do, the more people that can play and be put positions where they feel comfortable and succeed."

Because NOTHING says good roster management by potentially carrying David Ross, Javy Valentin, AND Paul Bako on your team.

""Boy, [Norris Hopper] can hit that ball hard. He's a strong little dude," Baker said. "The ball made a loud sound. I use my ears a lot. I can tell what kind of bat speed [he] has by that sound."

Let's be clear here: nothing says good hitter like Dusty's abillity to hear ball hit bat. And, since Norris Hopper potentially stands in the way of Jay Bruce making it to the Reds' starting line-up on Opening Day, consider this goodness from Swamp all-timer (and hopefully soon front page poster Mr. Delaware):

"I like that the sound of Hopper's bat is giving him the leg up over the mere stat based potential of Bruce. You guys are fucked. (Check out Bruce's 90th percentile PECOTA projection. .298/.371/.592 with 41 HRs. Wow.) (Hopper's is .334/.383/.406. 0 HRs. In 4,049 professional PAs, he has 4 HRs. How hard can someone hit a fucking ball if they're leaving the ballpark, at best, once every thousand plate appearances?)

Well, yeah. Good points Poindexter, nerdy stat guy, geek. I direct your attention to another of Dusty's quotes this week:

"All I've seen is stats. There's more to being in the big leagues than just stats. Everyone is so stat-conscious. You get away from: Can he do the little things ... to play winning baseball?"

Well. Consider yourself schooled, Mr. D. So, CAN Jay Bruce do the little things? Or is he just going to hold the Reds back with his power and speed? Huh? Thought so. You are not so tough now, are you, stats boy?

And, finally this, which is just FANfuckin'tastic in all of its jaw-droppingly old-school glory:

"I'm big on driving in runs and scoring runs," Baker said. "Guys in the middle should score about close to equal to what they drive in. On-base percentage, that's fine and dandy. But a lot of times guys get so much into on-base percentage that they cease to swing. It's becoming a little bit out of control."

Yeah, stupid people who work walks, get on, um, "base", and drive up pitch counts. Dumbasses. Don't they see it is out of control?

For the record, I find the OBP stuff from him less than surprising. From my post expressing my pain at the hire back on October 14 of last year, here was my first enumerated problem with it:

"1. He abhors walks and thinks "hitters should hit". Be afraid, owners of Adam Dunn in 2008. Be very afraid. I cannot imagine what the bitching will be like between Baker and uber-grump Marty Brennamen on the pre-game shows on days after Dunn has a few of his usual Ks. You can't get odds in Vegas on Baker and his desire to "fix" Dunn this spring. Nevermind that Dunn remains one of the top 10 productive hitters in baseball."

So far, he has left Dunn alone. Then again, they have not played a spring training game yet, so, wait for that. As for the first sentence: check.

The good people at Fire Joe Mogan have now realized the wonderful stupid falling from Dusty's mouth, and are limbering up. Should be happy hunting for them all season. Hell, consider that the OBP quote from Baker was SO stupid that Ken Tremendous, six days after the birth of his first child, was compelled to address it. So, props to Baker for that.

At any rate, I consider it my duty to keep wanderers through this part of the 'net up to date on all things stupid said by Dusty. As a Reds fan, I guess I will consider it some sort of punishment. Not sure for what, but the pain has begun.