Hood to Coast Profile #5 - The Replacements
We did have twelve runners from The Swamp at one point. For one reason or another, good (JoeyClams, PresidentCerrano, GovementChedda, Brainbo) or bad (Bronto - pinnacle of health my ear), like it or not, some had to drop out. Thusly, we have had to scramble to find runners to fill their spots.
The first Non-Swamper signed up was Momma Pentagonz. A serious runner, if a suspect child-rearer, Momma Pentagonz has been on board from the start. She will be running Leg 8 (14.39 miles, 10th most difficult) and riding in Van #2. It is expected that she will compete with GPJ for the title of Bear Safety Warden, as she has more first-hand experience than the merely theoretical work of Jones. She is the front runner for the most likely to say something off-color to make everyone else breathe a bit easier in her presence.
SpongeLikeNinja found the second non-swamper, a friend of his with the absolutely stunning initials AB. AB the Unswamped, as it were, has run several 50K races, which is, and I mean this in the nicest way, stupid. I don't think I've run 50K total in preparation for this race. Pork (The Other AB...get it?) is running Leg 10 (17.89 miles, 4th most difficult leg), which after running 50K is merely a warm down. It is expected he will run back to Portland to catch his flight.
The third and fourth replacements are a couple who were found by TommyBoy via a swinger's message board. The two mentioned that they would "run to the ends of the earth" for a nice, clean, non-infected experience with a good Catholic family. TommyBoy said "How about just to the Pacific Ocean, with no promises as to the other caveats?" Their first questions after joining were "You guys like beer, right?" The Naturals. Remco (the "man" of the relationship) is a Hood to Coast veteran who will run Leg 5 (17.91 miles, 2nd most difficult) while Karen (soon to be the "man" of the relationship once the two marry, effectively ending Remco's days as a man) will run Leg #4 (14.74 miles, 11th most difficult).
The last replacement was garnered also by TommyBoy from another message board (the man is indefatigable) and can run eight-minute miles. "Jim," if that is his real name, will compete with howard in nyc for oldest male in Van #2. A nineteen time Hood to Coast Veteran, Jim will run Leg 11 (15.85 miles, 8th most difficult). Jim is "Most Likely to Mutter 'What Have I Gotten Myself Into' Under His Breath.
Next: Brian!