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(More’s the pity, may FJM rest in peace—Mem Bengal)

But this can’t be ignored.

I realize that the point has been debated in the Swamp when the signing was first made official, but I have to bring this up again. That weird Raul Ibanez signing in Philly, defended once again. For all the weird reasons.

1. The “everyday player for the last eight seasons” caveat isn’t in play here. The variation from Ibanez’s top OPS month over his career to his low OPS month is 187 points, with his highest being .900 in the month of June. Burrell’s is 175 points, and his highest OPS month is May, when he OPSes .930. Yet Ibanez is the more consistent of the two players?

2. Ah, but the measure of Burrell’s consistency is his AVG. Oh man….

2A. Ibanez’s career OBP is .347. Burrell’s is .367. Only in 2003 has Ibanez had a higher OBP than Burrell.

3. Yes, Burrell did hit lower than .227 in three months in 2008. But he OPSed .856/.618/.719 in those three months. Ibanez’s lowest three OPS months in 2008? .827 (x2)/.673/.593. Oh, that .593 was in September, which some people like to refer to as “clutch time.”

4. First, I need to quote.

The one potential knock on the Ibanez signing: He’ll be 39 when his three-year, $30 million deal ends. But he’s a low-mileage Ibanator 3000X; signing him is like buying a ‘74 Lincoln from a little old lady who only drove it to church. As mentioned above, he’s only been a regular for seven seasons — and he’s played 162 games in two of the last four seasons. And he’s in freakishly good shape.

4A. Burrell is seven years younger. And signed for one less year at $2 million less per. And he may even be a better defender.

4B. Nicknames suck. As do car analogies to baseball players

4C. No mention of the fact that Ibanez is lefthanded and joins a lineup that has Utley and Howard batting third and fourth. (Psssst: they’re lefthanded too). And there’s no mention anywhere of Jayson Werth, who is going to be needed desperately to be the righthanded bat in the middle of the lefties against lefthanded pitchers.

4D. Baseball is not like football, where riding the bench can add years to a running back’s career. Ibanez is on the downside of his career.

4E. Unless, you know…

(Mister Delaware adds: Philadelphia also gave up their first round pick for Ibanez, where resigning Burrell or signing Adam Dunn (who, as a far superior player, got the same AAV for a year less) costs nothing but money. Brutal, brutal job by Amaro here. I’d argue this is worse than Farnsworth because atleast he might be able to be flipped at some point to a contender in need of a bullpen arm. Ibanez is going nowhere no matter what.)