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* Is Jose Reyes the new Carl Pavano? At least Pavano wasn’t a first round fantasy pick. Reyes has injured himself again.

He already had a torn tendon in the area, so he decided to go for the surgical BOGO, and tore his right hammy while running on Tuesday.

He has only been out of the lineup since May 20th and at that time, in true Belichick fashion, the Mets insisted that Reyes was day-to-day.

Well Mr. Met, aren’t we all day to day? Unless you are in the cast of Flash Foward, no one truly knows if they will be alive in six months. There are few guarantees when it comes to injuries in sports. In fact I can only think of one. Hines Ward will never have a torn ACL in his right knee. (He doesn’t have one.)

And where was Reyes running to? The bank to deposit his ginourmous paycheck?  Well at least the Mets only have to pay him 9 million next year.

* Joba rules. That can be taken only one way this year. The decision making of how to handle Joba this year has been Clintonesque at best, resulting in enough waffles for a church breakfast.

The best quote of the postgame locker room came from Joba Chamberlain, when he was asked what he thought about his role on the Yankees postseason roster.

“If they want me to fold towels, I’ll fold towels,” Chamberlain said. “I don’t really care. I’ll do anything to win on this team.”

Most of the rest of his session with the media was less exciting, but Chamberlain admitted that his tenuous position is the result of his own inconsistency. He had a chance to put a lot of questions away tonight if he followed up his strong outing against Boston with another one. Instead, it’s hard to figure what the Yankees are going to do with Chamberlain come next week.

At this point, it’s a virtual lock the Yankees will take the longer ALDS and need only three starters. That means they could put Chamberlain in the bullpen or leave him off the roster, with the idea that maybe he goes to Tampa to throw during the first round and prepare for a start in the ALCS. Then again, they may not even feel comfortable enough to pitch him at all.

* One billion dollars. That’s a lot of money, period.  You can buy a lot of shit for a billion dollars, like a new stadium in Dallas so you can get caught picking your nose on national TV during your team’s first home game. But somehow I don’t think Tiger Woods will be doing anything like that. He is the first athlete to earn ONE BILLION DOLLARS.

TigerWoods  can add one more accolade to his trophy case: the first athlete to earn $1 billion. Our calculations show that the $10 million bonus Woods earned winning this year’s FedEx Cup title nudged him over the $1 billion mark in career earnings.

* Jacksonville Jaguars quarterback David Garrard thought hosting a weekly radio show would be a good idea. He was meeting fans, answering questions, giving away tickets and previewing the team’s upcoming game.

Maybe he should have discussed it with coach Jack Del Rio first.

When Del Rio learned about Garrard’s Friday show, which aired the last three weeks, it was canceled faster than a network television dud.

“Less than 48 hours away from the game, it’s not even a question,” Del Rio said. “I don’t even understand how anybody could ever advise somebody to think about doing something like that. It makes no sense.”

So Coach Del Rio thought one of his players showed poor judgement. “It makes no sense,” was his final statement.

Hummmm. He publicly humiliates the one guy on the team, that is by job description, supposed to make decisions. Instead of taking him aside and suggesting a change of day, for instance, the coach just cancels the show. That’s how you run a tight ship. Look alive, be sharp, act smart. This looks like a severe case of do as I say, not as I do.

When rookie coach Jack Del Rio placed a stump of oak and an ax in the Jacksonville Jaguars locker room a few weeks ago as a motivational technique, symbolic of his theme to “keep choppin’ wood,” it was viewed as a sophomoric technique by some veterans.

Now the move is likely to be regarded as a huge mistake.

The Jaguars on Thursday lost Pro Bowl punter Chris Hanson for an undetermined amount of time — ESPN.com has learned that he will be sidelined 4-6 weeks and could well miss the balance of the season — when the fourth-year veteran was accidentally gashed on his right (non-kicking foot) while wielding the ax.

If I was Garrard I would have to ax my Coach a few questions.

* With a streak of 5 wins in ESPN’s Streak for Cash I figured the most obvious play for last night was #4 Ole Miss over unranked SouthCarolina. This did not even have anything to do with a point spread, just win baby. Colour me surprised.

Once again, Steve Spurrier, the man who couldn’t coach in the NFL, wreaked havoc with his team on the field.  The Ole Miss  Rebels entered with their highest ranking since Archie Manning was quarterback in 1970. But against Spurrier, the Ole Miss coach, Houston couldn’t bust a Nutt.

The stats of the game are amazingly equal. A difference of 37 net yards. Each team had no picks, one lost fumble and 4 sacks. And yet South Carolina came out of the game ahead 16-10.

Amazing how often the Visor gets lucky.

* Fret not Adrian Peterson fantasy owners. He says his back injuryis much adieu about nothing. How he lasted until the 4th pick in one of my leagues will always remain a mystery. Of course, I picked 5th.

* J.R. Rider was arrested, again. Yawn.

* Hanley Ramirez is a solid #1 fantasy pick and he has given his owners some fantastic numbers this year. In fact he is having a year of historic proportions according to the Palm Beach Post:

When Dick Groat hit .325 for the 1960 Pittsburgh Pirates, he became the first National League shortstop to win the batting title in 25 years.

Almost five decades later, no one has matched Groat’s accomplishment. But Florida’s Hanley Ramirez is close to changing that.

* Giants Safety Kenny Phillips is done for the season.  Phillips had two receptions from Tony Romo, I mean interceptions, Sunday night has been placed on injured reserve with has been described as an “unhealty knee”. Next up someone will actually explain what a sports hernia is, because my Doctor says he doesn’t know.

* Plaxico Burress can learn a lot from Tom Brady. A lot.

Even if he loses a freshly-filed civil lawsuit, New England quarterback Tom Brady will not face NFL suspension for an alleged shooting incident at his April wedding in Costa Rica.

Two photographers are seeking $1 million in damages from Brady and wife Gisele Bundchen. Yuri Cortez and Rolando Aviles claim that Bundchen’s security team fired guns at their car when the paparazzi refused to surrender their camera equipment. Cortez and Aviles filed suit Tuesday in a New York City court.

“Bodyguards are not supposed to be pulling out guns and firing at photographers,” Aviles and Cortez’s attorney John Paul Gleason told People Magazine. “It just shows terrible lack of training and supervision.”

* Is that a Beanie or a Yarmulke? 

Beanie Wells is toting a football with his name on it from the locker room to meetings at Arizona Cardinals headquarters this week.

Teammates try to sneak up and strip the ball from him. If he drops it, he pays a $200 fine to charity. So far, he said, that hasn’t happened.

* Wayman Tisdale, a three-time All-American at Oklahoma who played 12 seasons in the NBA, died after a two-year battle with cancer. He was 44.

Tisdale’s death was announced on the Oklahoma Senate floor Friday by Senate Majority Leader Todd Lamb, who led the chamber in prayer.

I had forgotten how dominant he was in college until I read his bio. I will also miss his jazz music.

* The Washington Redskins won another legal victory Friday in a 17-year fight with a group of American Indians who argue the football team’s trademark is racially offensive.

I personally do find this to be offensive. What’s next? The Boston Mick’s, The New York Hymies, The West Virginia Inbred Hillbillies? Where do you draw the line?

Just because this country was settled as a result of  the genocide of the indigenous people of this continent doesn’t mean we have to keep rubbing their face in it.

*  A day after learning Jeremy Mayfield failed a drug testfor something other than a performance-enhancer, NASCAR allowed him to drive a race car at Darlington Raceway at speeds up to 173 mph.

What do they check for?  Octane? STP? Amour All? Nitrous?

* The joy Florida Marlins rookie Chris Coghlan felt after hitting his first major league home run was tempered slightly by the hardball negotiations he went through to reclaim the souvenir.

Coghlan’s home run was caught Wednesday night by a Milwaukee Brewers fan who refers to himself as “The Happy Youngster” and claims on his blog to have caught nearly 50 homers.

And while Coghlan said the fan was willing to give the ball back, the man’s original asking price was a lot higher than the Marlins rookie outfielder anticipated.

“While posing for the photo, he said, ‘You gonna give me the ball, man, or what?”‘ Yohanek said. “After he was given the home run ball, he stormed off without a word. Only to return and say, ‘Why y’all gotta hold my ball for ransom?’ I hold balls for ransom?Those are Chris Coghlan’s words, not mine.”

* NBC’s sports websites have always been an afterthought to most of us. To improve their site they started hiring bloggers like Aaron Gleeman. Now they have a page that is just constant baseball news and some analysis using stats and math.

That’s why none of us got hired. Those stats and math can be a lot of work. Shit we just got spell check. Here is their site.

* Tim Brown takes shots at Skeletor.

“Meeting Al [Davis] was pretty unique. I found out five or ten minutes after my first practice there that he hated African-American athletes from Notre Dame. And they literally told me that. They literally told me that because we’re known for using our education more than our athletic ability that he thought that I would be one of these guys that would basically take the money and run. I don’t know if that was a ploy to get me amped up, but it certainly worked.”

* Stealing Home was a 1998 movie where Jodie Foster played a heterosexual woman.  Pretty good acting. Last night JasonWerth of the Phillies,  stole and stole and stole. Beginning the game with 3 steals to his credit this year he either had a rocket pack installed or read something in the scouting report.

He stole second, third and then home. Video is here.

* I recall a few years ago when I just couldn’t say enough bad stuff about Carl Pohland and the Twins skipping Mark Prior in the draft, because of money, to take hometown boy Joe Mauer. It didn’t look good we were told Prior was the best college pitching prospect since Tom Seaver. Things may have turned out differently if this didn’t happen: “Mark, I’d like you to meet your manager Dusty Baker. Your career will end shortly.”

Now the hyperbole machine wants us to believe that Stephen Strasburg may be the best pitching prospect ever. At least since Brien Taylor. Oooohhh Body slam to the left shoulder.

The numbers this season are video-game quality: 11-0, 1.24 ERA, 164 strikeouts, 17 walks, 48 hits in 87 1/3 innings. He’s struck out 16.9 per nine innings, on a pace to break the Division I record held by Ryan Wagner. He’s reportedly hit triple digits on the radar gun with some regularity. The icing on the cake came on Friday when he tossed his first no-hitter, striking out 17 against Air Force with most of the Washington Nationals’ brain trust in attendance at Tony Gwynn Stadium.

We’ll know in about 4 years.

* Ryan Zimmerman at 30 games and counting. He’s only hitting over .500 for the month of May and yet their last weekend home game, May 2nd, they couldn’t even draw 20,000. This weekend begins a long homestand with Philly, then Pitt and finally the Orioles. Let’s see if they can fill some seats.

What is making things easier for Zimmerman is having Adam Dunn hit behind him. So far this season Dunn is batting .313 with 11 homers and 28 RBI, backed by a .448 on-base percentage. Scouts have rave about how Ryan has shortened his swing even taking inside fastballs through the middle.

* Looks like the Pirates may be playing dirty pool. The Pirates did not bench second baseman Freddy Sanchez twice last week to hold down his plate appearances and keep him from triggering an $8.5 million vesting option for 2010, team president Frank Coonelly said last night.

He goes on to defend his manager, blah, blah, blah. The only problem with all this hot air is that Sanchez is having a pretty good year so far. A .889 OPS for a middle infielder is fantastic and maybe it’s time to adjust your fantasy roster. As for the Pirates justifications…. those are fantasy too. I could sit here and call out Frank Coonelly almost daily. Now there’s a guy who might be better off running a Dairy Queen.

* The Human Vacuum cleaner, Brooks Robinson, has undergone successful treatment for prostate cancer.

“It was diagnosed very early and I underwent 39 radiation treatments,” Robinson said during a downtown luncheon for the American Cancer Society. “I feel healthy and fine and I’m grateful that I was vigilant about my health.”

I mention this for two reasons. One, I wish Brooks and his family well. Two, some of you reading this haven’t been to the doctor in years. So go get a check up and some blood work done before you find yourself rotting from the inside out.

* Watch out bitches, it’s Phil Hughes time.

Phil Hughes wasn’t just good last night, he was great. Six scoreless innings, two hits, two walks, six strikeouts. He threw 59 of 99 pitches for strikes and never cracked in a scoreless duel with Edwin Jackson.

“He was getting quick with his lower half and I said something to him,” pitching coach Dave Eiland said. “He made the adjustment whereas last year he had something else in his head. He’s much more focused and confident now.”

I’ll take it as long as it lasts because the likes of Kennedy and Igawa lurk in AAA. Doc Medich isn’t walking through that door.

* Javier Lopez took his eyes off the ball for an instant – and Boston’s 11-game winning streak was over.
Mark DeRosa had four hits and scored from second base on Lopez’s error with two outs in the ninth inning as the Cleveland Indians rallied to beat the Red Sawx 9-8 on Tuesday night.

”It’s a play a pitcher makes a thousand times in his career,” Lopez (0-2) said of covering first base on an infield grounder. ”I just took my eyes off it. There’s no real excuse for it. It’s a tough way to break a winning streak.”

* Only Chicago Cubs manager Lou Piniella could stop Carlos Zambrano .

With Zambrano needing a triple for the cycle, Piniella decided to lift his ace after seven sharp innings and 111 pitches. Zambrano settled for a homer, double and single as the Chicago Cubs routed the Arizona Diamondbacks 11-3 on Tuesday night.

Asked if he would have liked one more at-bat, Zambrano replied, ”Yeah, why not? I think sometimes it’s good to break some records and be in the history” books.

”I run pretty good, you know,” said Zambrano, who has three career triples.
 

Only 111 pitches? Dusty Baker would have left him out there for at least 160 pitches. Pinella is such a pussy.

* The Arizona Cardinals lose their Edge. The Arizona Cardinals granted running back Edgerrin James’ wish to be released on Tuesday and cut two others who played significant roles in the team’s run to the Super Bowl.

While James’ move was anticipated, the release of cornerback Rod Hood and defensive end Travis LaBoy was not.The moves clear salary cap space for the Cardinals, who want to sign new deals with linebacker Karlos Dansby and safety Adrian Wilson, and eventually with unhappy wide receiver Anquan Boldin.

* Halfback Darren Sproles signed his one-year, $6.621 million franchise tag with the San Diego Chargers on Tuesday, ending any worry about a possible training camp holdout.

If a franchise player doesn’t sign his tender, he has the option of holding out and not having to pay any fine for missing practices. But not signing the tender leaves him vulnerable to having the team pull the tender. By signing the franchise tender, Sproles guaranteed his base salary of $6.621 million.

I am sure LT will no longer be a top fantasy pick, but that is now one expensive backfield. I see this as being LT’s last year with the Bolts and getting Sproles signed long term a major priority.

* Shades of Curt Schilling. Martin Brodeur overcame a bloody ankle and put the New Jersey Devils on the verge of eliminating the Carolina Hurricanes .

Brodeur overcame a first-period skate cut and tied Patrick Roy’s NHL record for playoff shutouts at 23, making 44 saves in New Jersey’s 1-0 victory over the Hurricanes on Thursday night.

* North Carolina juniors Ty Lawson and Wayne Ellington will enter the NBA draft, ending their college careers a few weeks after leading the Tar Heels to the national championship.

* The big schools didn’t want Stephen Curry, then were helpless in stopping his sweet-shooting stroke as he put tiny Davidson into the national spotlight.

Now after three seasons and plenty of records, Curry is taking his game to the NBA, presenting more intrigue in how the skinny, baby-faced guard with the great genes will fare at the next level.

* You got beat by a girl!!! Next time someone says you throw like a girl show them this.

On the pitcher’s mound, a 12-year-old girl from New Jersey is perfect.

Mackenzie Brown is the first girl in Bayonne Little League history to throw a perfect game. She retired all 18 boys she faced on Tuesday.

* This doesn’t sound to good. Florida’s Lee County turned over e-mails that included terms related to the building of a new spring training facility for the Red Sox to the FBI at the agency’s request. The team said it has no connection to the inquiry, despite the apparent inclusion of a member of its minor league operations staff among the search terms specified by the FBI.

* Joe Mauer will officially begin his minor-league rehab stint on Friday, playing for Class A Fort Myers at Palm Beach, a Twins spokesman said today.

*I have been swamped (pun intended) with work lately so the Nighty Cap has gone on a hiatus. This is not a good thing for me as sarcasm, snark and snide remarks just seem to ooze out of my pores. So let’s have some of the Triple S in the appropriate venue. And what have I been so busy with? Worms. No, I am not rubbing my butt on the carpet, I am referring to the Conficker. Of course it is known around here in the Midwest as the Cornfucker, which is probably a more apt description. Here is a simple primer to see if you are infected.

 
* Josh Beckett is a head hunter. Not the kind of guy to get you a job, but the kind of guy to Tony Conigliaro your ass.

Boston pitcher Josh Beckett has been suspended for six games and fined by Major League Baseball, which determined he intentionally threw a pitch near the head of the Los Angeles Angels’ Bobby Abreu last week.

So six games for a SP is really like one game but he misses six days pay. We could say this is not fair, but fuck these guys are millionaires anyway.

* If you first name was Lastings and you were playing for the worst team in MLB you would imagine you were safe through at least the All-Star break. Not so for Unlastings Millage who will now be back to riding buses in AAA. Oh the hype of a New York prospect.

* I have always hated Chip Caray. With a passion. He doesn’t even like baseball and wouldn’t even say Damned while promoting the Best Damned…. Sactimonious son of a bitch.  As far as I am concerned the only thing he should be announcing is a clean-up in Aisle 4. Ok so he didn’t lose his job, but the next best thing happened.

Opinionated former pitcher David Wells has signed a multiyear contract to serve as an analyst for TBS.

The network will make the official announcement Tuesday.

The 45-year-old Wells will work as a commentator for some Sunday regular-season games, forming a three-man booth with Chip Caray and either Ron Darling or Buck Martinez. He’ll also appear in the studio during TBS’s playoff coverage.

A beer endorsement has to be right around the corner for Mr. Wells, or rehab.

*No big surprise here. Connecticut’s Hasheem Thabeet has decided to give up his final year of college eligibility and enter the NBA draft.

* Big suprise here. Isiah Thomas  is back in coaching, and Florida International wound up as his surprising destination. Since he just won’t fade away maybe we can get him to start hanging out at Dodger Stadium.

*The Twins announced today that they have signed pitcher Scott Baker to a four-year, $15.25 million contract with an option for 2013.

Baker would have been eligible for arbitration after this season and eligible for free agency after 2012. So this deal buys out his arbitration years and gives them an option for his first year of free agency.

Looks like the Twins have taken a page out of the Indians’ handbook and stabilized the costs of their young players. Is this an indication of how the franchise will run now that Carl Pohland has passed on?

* Those wacky Latin players and their birthdays. Now it’s a big star:

Angels superstar Vladimir Guerrero reportedly has revealed that he was actually born in 1975, a year earlier than previously noted in his biographical information during his career, making him 34 now instead of 33.

Also it turns out that Julio Franco is really 63.

* Provided his schedule doesn’t change because of world events, President Obama is planning to throw the first pitch at the Washington team’s home opener April 13th. If he does well the Nats may even sign him. They need the arms.

* Radford University can get their dancing shoes along with Cornell and East Tenenssee State. 

* Charles Barkley is in jail. Well kind of. They have tents in Maricopa County and Sir Charles has been given his own private tent. He also brought along a few sport jackets that now serve as two man tents for other inmates. In the words of Charles himself:  “Round is a shape.”

* It seems as though Brian Giles has a little Jose Canseco in him. I don’t mean juice, rather instead bizarre behavior with a car:

A friend of Brian Giles’ ex-girlfriend has testified in a pre-trial deposition that she witnessed the Padres outfielder pulling his ex-girlfriend out of a car, pulling her by the hair and then nearly running her over.

* Sometimes I would find good stories in Newsday and link to them here on the Front.  But very soon we will no longer have that as an option.

The paper I delivered in my youth, thank g-d it was an afternoon paper then, is going to charge for its content. This is a stunning reversal of what every other newspaper in the country is doing.

Cablevision Systems Corp plans to charge online readers of its Newsday newspaper, a move that would make it one of the first large U.S. papers to reverse a trend toward free Web readership. 

* It’s an oof for Boof.  The Twins will likely be without pitcher Boof Bonser for the entire 2009 season after doctors discovered partial tears in the labrum and rotator cuff in his right shoulder during arthroscopic surgery on Wednesday. 

* Manny Ramirez turned down a 25mm offer to play for one year for the Dodgers. They also included a player option for next season for $20mm. Boras must be a genius, because the Dodgers aren’t bidding against anyone. Well at least not on this planet. Maybe on Manny’s home world he is getting a better offer. Will the dreadlocks save LA? Will Boras make a huge commission? Will Ned Colletti have a nervous breakdown?  Do the Dodgers really have that kind of money? Tune in tomorrow.

* One less NFL free agent available. Last year Deangelo Hall was released by the Raiders for playing too well. He fit in just fine in Washington and now has inked a 6 year 54mm deal with 22.5 mm guaranteed. Obviously Boras is not his agent. And Dan Snyder has the money.

* Certain signs of spring. Red breasted robins, Kerry Wood is hurt, Milton Bradley is hurt, and Mark Prior is trying to comeback, again.

* Things are amiss in the Valley of the Sun. Rumors have been widespread of all types of possible trades before the upcoming deadline. It seems to me that Steve Kerr doesn’t even  know his own  ass is on fire.

So how to solve the Suns problems? What would be a great knee-jerk reaction that would make the franchise appear to be a rudderless ship? Let’s fire the coach who has been on the job for four months. Yeah that’s the ticket.

Terry Porter is out as coach of the Phoenix Suns, just four months into his first season with the club.

Porter told The Associated Press on Monday morning that Suns general manager Steve Kerr broke the news to him at a Sunday night meeting.

“I’m going to wait a few days to gather my thoughts before I say anything,” Porter said.

And now I know something that makes myself and Terry Porter different. He is going to wait a few days before making a statement. Good for him. Maybe one day I will be that mature, but don’t bet on it.

*It is now time to adjust your fantasy football rosters for 2009. I would have imagined that after Plaxico encountered so much trouble while trying to adjust his rod, other NFL players would good a wide berth to handguns. Apparently, Marshawn Lynch didn’t get that memo.

Buffalo Bills running back Marshawn Lynch was arrested in Southern California on a weapons charge, police said Sunday.

* San Diego Padres reliever Heath Bell was initially bothered by comments from, of all things, a video game console.

But now the heir apparent to Trevor Hoffman credits his Nintendo Wii Fit game for helping him lose 25 pounds. Bell, who has been given the first crack at taking over the closing role vacated by Hoffman, reported to camp at a svelte 245 pounds.

The opportunity to take over for Hoffman, who is baseball’s all-time saves leader, was more than enough motivation for Bell. But Bell, who was 6-6 with a 3.58 ERA in 74 games last season, received an extra boost when he began playing video games with his children this off-season. At the time, Bell weighed 270 pounds.

“It said I was obese,”Bell said. “If you’re obese, it makes (your character on screen) obese. I was disappointed that I was that big. I literally took the game to heart. I did the work but I kind of credit the Wii Fit.” ( Editors Note: This is word for word cut and paste. You can’t improve on perfection)

* J.D. Drew is still hurting. The guy who is as fragile as a crystal chandelier is still having problems from a herniated disk. Having had a ruptured disk myself, I can tell you it is not an injury you can just shake off, but this is just another physical ailment in a long list. He is becoming the Mark Prior of outfielders.